Setting boundaries is vital in both personal and work relationships. This is because boundaries provide some kind of framework of instructions by which we would rather operate as adults. Boundaries are a clear indication of our preferences; they allow those we interact with to understand our likes and dislikes, what we are willing to put up with and what the deal-breakers are.
Setting boundaries and clearly communicating them is like offering a manual containing guidelines to the other person or persons. I believe this kind of clarity is necessary in preserving relationships as parties involved understand the rules, needs, wants, expectations, etc, knowing what's at stake. When a person is left without an understanding of us, they are likely to act in a way that offends us —especially in the long run, and this can ruin relationships. Phrases like, "I didn't know this would hurt you," can thus be avoided or minimized when we set boundaries.
Setting Boundaries Quotes
- "Boundaries are a part of self-care. They are healthy, normal, and necessary." – Doreen Virtue
- "When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated." – Brene Brown
- "Boundaries were necessary for a successful relationship. Most relationships aborted in the boundary defining stage. Not because people demanded what they needed. But because they didn’t, then got resentful about it." – Karen Marie Moning
- "Boundaries represent awareness, knowing what the limits are and then respecting those limits." – David W. Earle
- "Just as we expect others to value our boundaries, it's equally important for us to respect the boundaries of others." – Laurie Buchanan
- "Givers have to set limits because takers rarely do." – Henry Ford
- "Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself. It doesn’t make me mean, selfish, or uncaring (just) because I don’t do things your way. I care about me, too." ― Christine Morgan
- "Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins, leading me to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom." – Henry Cloud
- "Boundaries are the lines we draw that mark off our autonomy and that of other people, that protect our privacy and that of others. Boundaries allow for intimate connection without dissolving or losing one's sense of self." – Amy Bloom
For most people, setting boundaries does not come easily. Most adults feel guilty about setting boundaries (maybe because it makes us seem selfish), but as you can see, boundaries are a necessary part of self and relationship care for living our best lives.
When I did the video on 'Life has taught me these lessons recently' for my Youtube channel Lema Speaks, setting boundaries was number 1!
So, do not hesitate to set healthy boundaries as you go through life. Also, remember to respect the boundaries of others. If this blog post inspires you, be sure to share with family and friends.
Cheers to your success!